Feminist or Humanist?

Dear Carrie Hope Fletcher

You said that you were not a feminist, and at first I was very upset, because usually I think you are a great role model and I didn't understand why you wouldn't want to be. Why would anyone not want to support the social, political and economic equality of the genders? And then I realised that, despite that being the most common definition, most people tend to think feminism is something worse - the media portrays feminists as gangs of hooligans who throw burning bras at men, or something equally as insane. You also essentially defined yourself as equalist, or humanist, and I was wondering if this conversation I had a few days ago, might help explain where I think the difference is?

Two days ago I commented on a Laci Green video about why I was a feminist.

"I'm a feminist for a million and one reasons, but it all boils down to the fact I know that women are people."

And immediately somebody responded:

" you dont have to be a feminist to think Girls or womens are people. and allot of feminist got this dubel standard how Girls are victims and men are the oppressors"

I decided to continue talking to this person, because I thought that debate is always good, right? I quite strongly disagreed, but like with you, I understand the cause for confusion. Many people do seem to believe that feminists are "man hating" which is where I think this person was coming from. I explain briefly how the patriarchy has negative effects on men, here, if you are interested.

"I completely disagree. All feminism really is, is moving towards the social, political and economic equality of the genders. It's not about labelling women as victims - although to be honest, they often are the ones being oppressed - and if you believe that women deserve the same rights as men, then you're a feminist. Otherwise, you're sexist."

I do realise now that the last part of that comment comes across as very bigoted, but what I was trying to convey was that if you believe in feminism, which I had already defined as the "social, political and economic equality of the genders" you aren't sexist, but if you do not believe that the genders should be socially, politically and economically equal then you are. And I stand by the point I tried to make if not the original post. The person replied as such:

"here we go again you are pulling the victim card .: im not a feminist and im not a sexist but fore you to say i have to be a feminist to believe in equality is bullshit i'm a humanist not a feminist get your facts straight"

At first I was a little thrown by the other person defining themselves as humanist as whilst I knew quite a bit about equalist and feminist, I needed to check my facts about humanism. So I did, and this is what I found out. I think, as you seem to have ideas similar to humanism and equalism, that it might be worth reading into this as well, but I briefly summarise it here.

"Firstly, where did I "pull the victim card"? I did mention that women are often oppressed, and I stand by that. It's not pulling a victim card to say that about one in four women will be sexually assaulted, that one in three women will be abused in a relationship, et cetera. I too, identify as a humanist. It is perfectly possible to identify as both. Most feminists do, and it is very difficult to be humanist and believe in equality, and to not be feminist and include women in that equality. Feminism is only different as, because of the fact that society is mostly patriarchal feminism has to have a clear agenda - unless misogyny is directly addressed an acted against then equalist and humanist activism will not be enough."

The other person commenting did not seem to take my point well - and seemed to believe that I insinuated that only women are victimised. And I agree, yes, horrible things happen to other people, but it does not take a lot of study of statistics, of stories, of looking at the world around; to realise that the patriarchy does exist and that life is often made more difficult for you as a woman. You can be humanist and say you want equal rights for all, certainly, but to do that you need to support those who are oppressed and that is where feminism comes in, supporting women so we can reach equality.

if you wanna take up oppressed so will i. girls get 50% less in jail for the same crime.              one of four men get false rape accused who can ruin a Life.    in child support the favor the woman over the man 100%.              all this things i said now feminist don't give a shit about ..           so dont tell me the got a angel agenda when they ignore this

This person helpfully provided me with some examples of how other people are oppressed, but as I said, that doesn't show that women are not oppressed. And he said that "feminist don't give a shit about" these issues - a) actually, feminism reaches far further than many would expect. For instance, male rape is a big issue for activism by feminists, and things like that. Feminism is about equality of the genders, and about not letting the patriarchy hurt people - including men and trans* people. b) there are issues that feminists don't necessarily actively campaign for as a group, which is why many feminists are equalists and humanists also, they just recognise that to be a feminist you support the equality of the genders and to be humanist you support other forms of equality. Subscribing to one does not stop you from being the other. I finally replied with this and decided to leave the conversation before it descended into hate.

When since did saying that some women are oppressed, imply that no one else is oppressed at all? And actually, approximately 2% of rape accusations transpire to be false.

I'm not accusing you of being a bad person, but perhaps this post might have informed you into why you should reconsider not being a feminist? All being a feminist means is supporting the social, economic and political equality of the genders, and well - I'm pretty sure that is something we should all support.

Bella